Since first launching out Lost Boys work 18 months ago, the UK has begun a national conversation about the problems facing boys and young men. There have been political debates, news stories, documentaries, TV series, adverts and campaigns. New organisations and champions have emerged and the dial is beginning to shift.
But too much of it continues to focus on the problems. Phrases like “toxic masculinity” and the “manosphere” are now staples of public parlance but we still too often fail to recognise the quirks, contributions, and positive attributes of young men. At best, this leads us to misunderstand them; at worst, it leads us to demonising them. On top of this it creates a script for young men that is a series of “do nots” rather than providing a positive and ambitious vision for what being a man can be.
Lost Boys: From Boy to Man is our attempt to re-instill hope, guidance, and purpose in the lives of boys and young men in the UK. And with that in mind we have based not just the first recommendation, but the entire structure of this report, on the Success Sequence.
The Success Sequence is an evidence-based script for young people that tells them how to avoid poverty, attain a higher household income, and build strong relationships. The four clear steps of the sequence are: finish school (up to at least GCSEs), get a job, get married, and then have children if you want.
US studies show that 97 per cent of those who followed the entire sequence were not poor when they reached adulthood, while 86 per cent of those who either followed all the steps or were “on track” (those who are not yet married and without children but have finished their education and are in full-time work) were in the middle- or top-income groups. Our own data supports this finding for the UK population.
CSJ analysis of Understanding Society found that among 28-34-year-olds, 87 per cent of those who completed education, entered employment and then got married were in the middle or top third of the household income distribution, almost identical to the US figures. Additional polling of over 2000 people, commissioned for this report, showed a similar result. It found that for men who followed the Success Sequence, 69 per cent described themselves as on stable financial footing versus just 28 per cent for those with no coherent sequence.
With this evidence in mind, this report includes not just the advice for boys themselves to try and follow this sequence, but recommendations for wider policy and culture that would enable boys to take it. We look at school, employment, and the transition from adolescence into early manhood: instilling responsibility and building lasting relationships, and a family.
We also include a summary section on the role of technology, which constitutes a new arena, now permeating all schools, workplaces, and relationships and is therefore also profoundly relevant to all three.
In essence, the Success Sequence is about giving boys and young men a positive social script. Boys need fewer lectures about restrictive behaviour and negative masculinity, and more guidance about what a good and stable life could look like. The sequence is also incredibly appealing because it is grounded in data. It gives boys a vision of what their future could look like and how they can achieve it, with the importance of work and stable relationships embedded within it.
We do not claim that this is a panacea to boys’ woes, or the only way to cultivate ‘positive masculinity’. But it is a start. We urge others who share our aim – those longing to help boys thrive – to either get behind this or offer a viable alternative: something that offers boys hope, guidance, and purpose. The gauntlet has been thrown.
